Twenty-four young men, 12 from each of the opposing sides, stepped out from the ranks to fight. The bell to end the first round would have never rung if they had been in a timed fight. According to the report, each man grabbed another by the hair, pulled out his knife and stabbed his opponent. All twenty-four were dead. This is the battle by the pool of Gibeon from 2 Samuel 2. When we read it in our family devotional, I think my comment on the passage was, “That’s whacked!” They called the place where the battle was fought, “Field of Daggers or Hostilities” or in Hebrew Helkath Hazzurim.
There are living rooms that serve as the battle ground for that kind of fight. A husband and wife are each sent to the center of the room by their commanders (Captian Selfishambition and Corporal Imright). They fight without a plan, without thought, and without any sense. What they have is anger, a lust to win, and their weapons of words. When the battle is done, both of them are dead. Onlookers would say to themselves, “That’s whacked.” The kids immediately know what to call the living room. Later, the fighters (also called husband and wife), will know what to call it, too. The living room where husband and wife fight is called “Room of Daggers or Hostilities.” In Hebrew,Helkath Hazzurim. Hell for short.
Husbands love your wives, even when you are fighting with them. Wives, respect your husbands even when you are fighting with them. Here’s some help:
1. Determine that you want your marriage to win more than you want your spouse to lose.
2. Direct your anger at the issue instead of your honey.
3. Don’t cuss.
4. Remember that if you enter this fight yelling, it’s going to end with yelling. Approach softly.
5. Have a plan that leads you to resolution. If you don’t have one, email us, we’ll send you one.
6. If you grab your opponent’s hair, it’s time for a time out – never get physical in a fight with your spouse.
7. Believe you can have a good fight.
8. Look for the ways you can be transformed to be more like Jesus in the process.
9. Never threaten.
10. Let your children know about your healthy approach to disagreements.