We were absolutely opposed to divorce.
That’s exactly why were so blown-away by the fact that we were talking seriously about doing it.
As we look back at those days of misery, honestly they are a fog to us. The hopelessness that we were feeling during that time was overwhelming. The darkness in which we lived was dreary.
We’ve come a long way since those days. Thank you, God!
Now, when we are coaching couples to emerge from the pit – or to avoid it altogether – we revisit some of the significant heart-impacting principles that have guided us.
- Our problem was not that we were different. Our problem was that were unholy in the way we treated each other because of our differences.
- We might have each married the wrong person, but if we would each be the right person we could turn our marriage around.
- Trying to drag our deepest needs out of the other was a complete disaster. Living out our roles brings incredible freedom and success.
- Our marriage is the primary relationship in home.
- Keeping a covenant is both God-honoring and beneficial. Keeping a contract is destructive.
- Creating companionship intentionally is a must. Drifting always leads you to plunging over the waterfall.
- Married people hold hands, engage with each other, have fun, and have sex – ask any 12 year-old.
- Daily, predictable time (DPT) is a necessary shot in the arm for married couples.