Don’t Do What I Did

“Here and now” is not always the place and time to have an important and difficult conversation.  When you have mutually agreed on a time to have it later, you can and should treat each other in loving ways leading up to your communication.

JL would do that for me. If there was an important conversation to have, but Monday night was not the time to have it, we might agree on 6:00 p.m. Tuesday; and that I would call the meeting.  On Monday night, then, we might play a game, watch our favorite show, make love, and go to sleep.  Tuesday morning, I might kiss JL as we got out of bed and say, “Good morning.” She might smile.

By Tuesday noon, I might make a mental note that she has been kind all morning and hasn’t mentioned the issue at all.

Now, don’t do what I did.

I would begin thinking that maybe she was feeling like we didn’t need to have the conversation after all. As the time approached, she still is treating me with love and still not saying anything about our appointment.  I might notice that when 6 p.m. arrived, we were both engaged in something and 6 would slide by, then 7, then 8 p.m.

I might realize at that point that she looks disappointed and has grown quiet.  Then I might realize that my assessment was wrong.

I should have kept my word to call the meeting being grateful for the loving ways we had treated each other though there was an important, difficult conversation to have.  Instead, I have given the impression that the conversation was not important. I’ve also demonstrated that I don’t keep my word about schedules. I’ve also poisoned future conversations because I’ve shown that if right here, right now isn’t good, putting it off may mean never having it.

Don’t do what I did.  If you agree to a later time to communicate, make that appointment sacred and treat each other with love in the meantime. — Richard

Here’s how you can thank me for sharing my screw-ups over the years with you. LOL

Hope you are off to an aMayzing start of 2023!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.